So, I’m sitting at work and watching the world burn down around me and I’m calm as a Hindu cow. I’m working with one guy who always has a great carefree attitude and that makes the work day go by that much easier.
I was talking to him and telling him how much I just want to let things slide and how that has been a goal of mine for years now. I just want the ability to let all those things that do no matter, just not matter. Then I told him, in a way, The Dude is my idol.
I came to the Big Lebowski much later in life than most. I’d seen it a couple times before, but it wasn’t until maybe four or five years ago that I truly realized its greatness. I think my movie interests matured a little and I was finally able to comprehend and appreciate the Cohen Brothers sense of humor and that made a little light bulb go off the next time I saw The Big Lebowski.
I don’t smoke or drink, so obviously The Dude wasn’t an ideal role model, but I did appreciate his views on life and how just laid back he was. I can see why Dudeism became a thing, because in a crazy world sometimes you need someone who just cuts through the BS to show you the light.
I’m a natural fighter. I’ve always bucked authority, spoke out at injustice, and all that jazz. I used to get fired up when I was in high school and have been known to rant occasionally. I’ve definitely chilled over the years (much to the surprise of some people) and I usually tell them I chilled because life beat me down, but that’s not the total truth. The truth is I realized that life can only beat you down if you let it. I learned to adjust my expectations out of life, people, authority, the government, etc. and by change the perspective I realized just how powerless I was. No one cares about that loud mouth on the corner, and people care even less now since the internet has given everyone a voice and apparently everyone has chosen to use those voices to bitch about anything and everything.
See, I did it again.
I’m just sick of caring. Hell, in a way, not caring is the new caring. It’s the counter culture movement. People notice that quiet guy now, because everyone else is too busy screaming over each other.
I’ve talked a bit about wanting a peaceful life and that truly is my goal now. I don’t want to do things that I don’t want to do, and I want to spend more time doing the things that I do want to do. I want to communicate with the people I like, and spend less time with the people I don’t. Maybe my views are changing as I’m getting older, but I just want to chill the hell more. I want things to roll off me a bit more and I want to just go with the flow.
I gotta stop taking life so serious. None of us are getting out of it alive.